Episode 32: Articulate for Power

Hello, my friends welcome to episode 32. Did you check out my website and get my free training? it is up and ready just for you! Please go get it! It’s all about saying No and I know that is something we all struggle with! Remember is christinawilliamscoaching.com!

Now for today’s topic. I wanted to build a bit off of what we talked about last week on reactions always making sense. I hope that you took some time and explored that connection between our thoughts and our reactions.

I find that once I can see how it all makes sense then I can have so much more compassion for my reaction and the reactions of others.

I can see that I was being a human who reacts poorly sometimes and they were being a human who also reacts poorly sometimes.

The challenge we face is that we get it wrong 50% of the time. So we have lots of opportunities to practice this work of becoming aware of our reactions.

Now I know you may get sick of hearing me talk about the power of becoming aware but I can’t stress how important it is.

Awareness can be like opening the gate to a whole new pasture.

A different way of thinking, a different way of reacting, a different way of living.

Now, why is awareness and the ability to articulate the experience so important?

If we don’t have the ability to see our own reactions then we don’t have the ability to have power over them.

Brené Brown in Atlas of the Heart describes this perfectly she says:

“When we name an emotion or experience, it doesn’t give that emotion or experience more power, it gives us more power.”

When we won’t look at our emotions. They rule us. I mean rule us.

It is crazy. How much they rule your life.

How we can be completely consumed by a thought? You will react and live from that place.

Think about sorting cows.

When we think someone created more work for us (on purpose) - we are crazy.

When we think no one appreciates your help – you have no problem walking out.

But if we can become aware.

Articulate our experience.

We get power over it.

It is worth the time to become so well acquainted with yourself that you know what your ruling thoughts and beliefs are.

I have noticed in myself that some of the thoughts that result in me being the most reactive are the most simple almost fact-like sounding thoughts. Small things that are “Just the way things are”.

He was disrespectful.

She was rude.

He was talking down to me.

He was condescending.

They can’t say that to me.

It shouldn’t have happened to me.

They never listen.

She doesn’t care.

None of this is right.

See these little interpretations of a situation. They just sound like you are describing what happened but they are interpretations.

If we can identify them.

If we can put them into words, write them on paper.

If we can see them.

Then we get power over them.

What if it was ok that you reacted the way you did?

What if it was ok that they reacted the way they did?

We know the reaction makes sense if we knew what they were thinking.

So this is our opportunity.

Compassion for the reaction.

Action to take care of ourselves.

Action to decide how we will react in the future.

This is where your power is.

It will be fun.

Have a wonderful week.